Life Insurance:
A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die
Rich.
Nurse:
A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a
woman gains her masters.
Divorce:
Future tense of Marriage.
Tears:
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by
feminine waterpower.
Lecture:
An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer
to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of
either"
Conference:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes
he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary:
A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody
disagrees later on.
Criminal:
A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.
Boss:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are
early.
Politician:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence
after.
Doctor:
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Classic:
Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office:
place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn:
The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.:
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually
do.
Committee :
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience:
The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb:
An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher:
A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when
dead
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