Topic: A Good Joke

[|BUG|SoulCollector]

> >
> > > Dear Technical Support,
> >
> > >
> >
> > > 18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates > > > 4.2,
> >
> > > which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are
> >
> > > apparently conflicts between these two products and the only
solution
> >
> > > was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several
> >
> > > other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and
> >
> > > Playboy 6.9.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better. I tried a
> >
> > > shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a
virus
> >
> > > in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several > > > weeks.
> >
> > > Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at > > > the
> >
> > > same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected
each
> >
> > > other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this
> >
> > > product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife > > > 1.0
> >
> > > tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled
with
> >
> > > FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could > > > be
> >
> > > very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were
> >
> > > automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be > > > deleted.
> >
> > > They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.
> >
> > > Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter,
and
> >
> > > can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These
latter
> >
> > > products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the
> >
> > > problem is.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
> >
> > > requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle > > > Express
> >
> > > which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife > > > 1.0
> >
> > > attaches itself to my Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often
> >
> > > crashes.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw,
> >
> > > which can't be turned off.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there > > > could
> >
> > > be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if
Wife
> >
> > > 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all of your Money
before
> >
> > > uninstalling itself.

[-=SC=- Brewmeister]

Beauty!!!   

[|BUG| Whiteeyes]

good one Soul 

[|BUG| Mojo]

Oldie but Goodie   

[|BUG| Shamu]

Are all those ">>>>>>>" a Scotsman with a stutter?

[Beckett]

Are all those ">>>>>>>" a Scotsman with a stutter?

lmao

[|BUG|SoulCollector]

> >Dear Tech Support:
> >
> > >
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and > > > noticed a
> >
> > > distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in > > > the
> >
> > > Flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly > > > under
> >
> > > Boyfriend 5.0.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable > > > programs,
> >
> > > such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed
> >
> > > undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket
3.0.
> >
> > > Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. > > > I've
> >
> > > tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. > > > What
can
> >
> > > I do?
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Signed,
> >
> > > Desperate
> >
> > >
> >
> > >
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Dear Desperate:
> >
> > > First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, > > > while
> >
> > > Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try entering the command:
> >
> > >
> >
> > > C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download Tears 6.2, which should
> >
> > > automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works as
> >
> > > designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the > > > applications
> >
> > > Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above
> >
> > > application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence > > > 2.5,
> >
> > > Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create > > > Snoring
> >
> > > Loudly.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is > > > not
a
> >
> > > supported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have > > > limited
> >
> > > memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might > > > consider
> >
> > > buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I
> >
> > > personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
> >
> > >
> >
> > > Good Luck,Tech Support
> >
> > >
> >